Summer 2009: During the Core prep class, There was an exercise it read “Pray to God to challenge you for the coming year.”  As a joke to myself I prayed to God to test my patience. I knew I had a ton of that at least… That’s what I thought at the time….

I wasn’t prepared.  Never served before, had no idea how to run a fellowship.  Nonetheless I was excited to get into it.  I had high hopes for this journey.   I thought I had the support I needed, and was confident to get my feet wet.  Our main goal was just to establish a fellowship again.  There wasn’t really one existing the year before I served. So imagine a ship being built as you sail it.  Yup Ladies and Gentlemen that was the task at hand.



The biggest fear is being in front of a crowd.  I didn’t want to open, I didn’t want to Pray, I didn’t want to do any of that.  I just had to do it though, there was no one else really other than my partner, but that’s about it.



There’s a point during the middle of the first semester where I was put to the test.   I was challenged in all aspects of my life.  I could not believe how my job was being run, under staff and customer service became a joke to them. On top of that my friends, people I knew way before I came to AACF, my close friends gave me an ultimatum it was either them or AACF.  It turns out that it was way more important for me to be there at their parties, instead of being committed to something that was important to me.  They didn’t understand where I was coming from.  It was easier for them to label me as someone abandoning our friendship for other people.  Not getting into details.  The fellowship itself, I got chewed out for not meeting expectations. The sad part was I gave it my best shot.  I thought I did a good job, and to be put down like the way it happened was unfair.   Even my best wasn’t good enough. What kind of joke is this?  I wrestled with the idea of quitting, because I poured, effort, gave up relationships, for this fellowship just to get slapped in the face.  If God wanted to break someone he sure did a mighty good job at it.



I was not expecting that serving came at a price.  And as broken as I was, I had no other real options but to ask God. Why?  Why the heck am I serving in AACF?  Why am I even wasting my time here first place?  I wasn’t in it to make my partner happy.  I wasn’t in it to make staffers happy.  I was in it to bring back a fellowship that barely existed.  When we started that’s all I prayed for.  It was in AACF where I found Christ.  It was in this very fellowship where I found a different kind of community.  If I were to let this go, I failed in my part of providing a chance for you to know God.  I praise God for using a broken person like me to do something so impossible.  I lost my enthusiasm, my confidence, and yet when I prayed to God he gave me the spirit to go on.



The year before I served in core, AACF lacked cohesiveness between its members.  While serving every Wednesday large group as I set up, I see every person walking in with a smile, with an expectation to enjoy each others company.   I never ask God for a sign, but just seeing their faces made it worthwhile.   It was worth fumbling in front of you guys, it was worth mispronouncing words during announcements, it was so worth the sacrifices.  It isn’t sacrifice if it didn’t hurt.  And it was painful.  What you see today is a direct result of a simple prayer asking God just for a fellowship.  The bonus was celebrating birthdays, seeing friends mingle, hanging out with each other outside of large group.  When we go after the heart of God he surely will provide beyond expectations.



I miss coming up here and welcoming AACF, I miss opening in prayer, I miss standing in front of all of you.   And I dedicate my testimony to the new core, by seeing them serve the fellowship affirms every tear drop and every heartbreaking experience was well worth the ride.